Wake Up White Women

What to say?

What to do?

How to be with People of Color?

I’m stuck. Truly. For one who is rarely short on words, I’m a bag of emotions.

And, not sure if I want to blame it on the mixed messages of our country’s leaders or Mercury Retrograde or centuries of history where white privilege has been the norm or the fact that my antennae are hyper focused on receiving messages that are beyond and out of alignment with what I see with my eyes…

Whiteness. White privilege. White women. White culture. We are so IN in, it’s hard to imagine NOT being in it. Yet we share this world, this country, our communities, our neighborhoods, sometimes even our families with those who do not identify as white.

Waking up is painful. It’s easier to go back to sleep. Yet, we can’t sleep this nightmare away. It’s our responsibility to at least acknowledge this isn’t right. It can’t continue. I disagree. This feels wrong.

And I am not just talking about the horrific events last weekend and the lack of accountability by our top government officials to denounce it in a way, apologize in a way, unify in a way, that I had hoped he would.

I am speaking of all ways. Always. Speaking up. Standing up. Moving beyond our fear. Showing up. Not agreeing. Or, not standing by in silence.

No more hiding. Leaders do not hide. They do their work. They SHINE their most brilliantly when the times get dark.

And, I’m learning, that SHINING is not always easy. Or pretty!

Listen in and let me know what resonates. What doesn’t? It’s time to practice opening up and sharing in a more vulnerable way. I’d love to witness that from you.

More info on SHINE Principle at http://DeborahLeeAnn.com/Shine

Join the SHINE Challenge on FB here: http://bit.ly/ShineFBChallenge

Til our next time together, SHINE your light with love, compassion, and authenticity!

Conscious Creator or Reactive Victim

When seeing how I was allowing myself to get W A Y off-track today, I noticed that my thoughts were on a downward spiral.

And, after such a good morning!

Meditating, quiet time contemplating how to create my day, a great session with my shaman/business coach, some delicious coffee, and some creating of new connections for new business through a referral service..then BAM!

What I learned was that each of these “referrals” was costing me. Not even if they were qualified or for a $10,000 project, but even for single or short term $500 coaching package.

Ahhh, so this is the cost of being “in flow?”

Or, is it my resistance to being open to really having it come to me with grace and ease?

And, then the inner critic. The “I told you so!” The “you knew there would be a cost associated, didn’t you?” And on and on. Down the slippery slope of shame, doubt, confusion, until I hit victim. This is where I walk around, looking for something to eat, activities to distract, and ways to numb.

I really dislike feeling yucky like that anymore. And I am beginning to become aware of it earlier and earlier.

So, what to do now?

Focus.

Inward and downward. Remembering this is all temporary, and a result of where I WAS, not where I’m going.

Clarity emerges. Bit by bit. With each breath. I am in Creative space. Bye-bye Reactive Self. I’m back in the driver’s seat. And, from here, the words flow.

Momentum is like being in a canoe floating down stream. It’s easy. It feels good. The scenery changes and I get to see what is around me.

So unlike fighting against the current. Where all my attention is on pushing and striving.

Back in Flow. Back to Creating my Life.

More will be shared in the podcast, I’m sure. Listen in?

Share with me, where do you get stuck? What are your practices for turning yourSelf around?

Authentic Anger

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned…

Authentic anger, especially for women, looks very different than a lot of we’ve been seeing, or what we’ve been taught, or what . AND, It’s true that women have a millennia or two worth of of actions and historical events and current events to be angry about.

I am and the perfect example. It was the first emotion available in my palette that allowed me to really feel and to tap into what was mine. My truth. My Authenticity. My Essence.

For that reason I think once opened to it, women tend use it as it as a weapon. As way of showing how strong and powerful we are.

A woman’s anger (picture the power of mother Earth’s storms!) is a lashing out, a destructive force. It’s a force you can’t deny. And, it’s often quick and swift. It’s a balancing of energy. It’s about standing strong in our essence, in our conviction and passion, declaring our truth.

It’s not a lot of words. It’s not a lot about the hurting of another. It’s not making the other pay or share in what’s our’s. It’s not about making a point by tearing down the other’s ego – be it physically, emotionally, spiritually.

It’s sad that we have not learned the teachings of Martin Luther King, Jr. and Gandhi around nonviolent conflict, peaceful protesting and working together TOWARDS an end, versus FIGHTING AGAINST the other. There’s a way of making a point with clarity and courageous conviction, sometimes even more so without words.

This reminds me of the Compassionate Samurai. A samurai warrior is trained in all of the martial arts and trains his body to be strong and powerful and also to open his heart. Open his/her mind in a way of serving for all. It’s it’s about dropping our ego, standing tall for the collective.

This is where a woman’s anger can be very affective. When we are fighting for our child or for the rights of all women, or a beloved, we do so in a forward thinking type of way. We want to create change that leads us towards where. We. Want. To. Go. (versus fighting back at what has happened)

This has to be a changed in our mindset. We can change our belief system to learn that what has happened has been the catalyst that turned on this emotion and power and sharpens our senses, and from there, discern how we will move or take action or respond in a way that generates momentum to build what we want.

Join me as we transform our Authentic Anger into the energy that spurs us as compassionate leaders, heard and seen as powerful, strategic, grounded and leading towards change.